You know what they say, "Everything has a silver lining"
Well, I wouldn't do that. But ya, there actually is a little something you could do. A couple grey green tiny dried up globules is what you might be unknowingly looking for. Yes, if you guessed it, I am scribbling this blog on 'Marijuana'.
Flagrant though it is, 'marijuana' or 'cannabis' consumption is thriving by the second in today's world.
As of 2010, more than 70% Americans reported to have used Marijuana for trial, a staggering 60% of which were youngsters. It is usually taken in as a joint, with tobacco rolled up within the infamous 'white paper stick'. The immediate effect is an increase in heart rate, red eye, physical imbalance and dry mouth. But who cares about these symptoms if the much desired symptoms include a multicolored extravaganza, incessant giggling, an overpowering sense of well being and a slight paranoia. When you mix the crushed tiny green blocks with tobacco, roll them up a cigarette and take a couple of puffs, the blood seems heavier than you ever knew it would. As if you just conquered the world and an improbable yet magnanimous acclaim awaits you.
Now, coming back to the point. Your friend. Aaah! Damn it! The friend! The exasperating friend shows up at your doorstep with the same attitude you really despise. Just when you're about to think of killing yourself, think again. You might have something in store for him this time.
"So, what's the action", he asks you with the same condescension.
(I wanna kill you, that's what the action is), Now I know that's how you'd love to reply.
Don't!
Instead, ask him if he has some time which sure as he is born, he will.
Take him out to a spot quite desolate. By desolate, I mean really really alone. A spot not even the air could locate. Offer him a cigarette. He would promptly take it. Light it up for him. I know you hate it but you wanna work up the plan right? So be a good boy and show some courtesy.
He would take a puff and would ask you, "Dude, where the hell is your cigarette?", he says when he is about to offer you his cigarette.
Now if you're an occasional smoker, I know the smell would instigate your gut to crave but you need to hold your ground. You don't wanna inhale that cigarette that is also secretly contaminated with nasty chunks of marijuana to which your friend is sadly oblivious.
So before he offers you his joint, take out your pure cigarette and start smoking slowly. Really slooooowly! Now you don't want him offering you his joint. Do you?
In a few minutes, he would start to feel dizzy. Being absolutely oblivious to marijuana effects, he would start to panic. Just revel in his predicament. Tell him bad things. Tell him, he's gonna faint. Tell him he's behaving too awkwardly. Even if he is not, he would start to believe you under the effect of marijuana. Ask him to sit down and close his eyes. Comfort him. He might fall asleep.
Now that you have taken your pleasure, you can choose whether to abandon him there or take him back. If I were you, I know I would leave him there.
This is just a small way to fabricate your revenge. I know it's way out of bounds and might land you in trouble. But, if handled properly, it's fun if operated on a one time experimental basis. It won't kill you and the fun is totally surreal. Still, if you're too skeptic, try it at your own risk. And please! Don't ever get addicted to it!
